Your Self-Worth
Embracing Your Self-Worth
Hello Readers,
“We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves.” -Malcolm X
Looking at yourself in the mirror is more than looking at how good or bad you may look before getting your day or night started. The purpose of a mirror is to be able to take a deep look at yourself and reflect on how far you have come throughout your life. Also, it is meant for you to be able to accept yourself, flaws and all, before anyone else. It is meant for you to be proud of the person that stands in your reflection in that mirror. And if you’re not able to take that deep look in that mirror and reflect without degrading yourself then we have a problem because it’s imperative that you know and appreciate your self-worth.
According to Merriam-Webster, self-worth is defined as a sense of one's own value as a human being: self-esteem. In my journey into adulthood, I have found myself struggling with identifying my own self-worth as I sought outside validation for it. I had to truly dig deep for me to recognize who Sharnell was and what she was worth as a person; not because of what others may think, but because of what I thought about myself. To begin the process of identifying my self-worth, I started to do the following:
Build my Confidence: I started to talk positively to myself on a daily. Repeating positive affirmations to uplift my spirits along with my confidence. This is important to do as we should always speak life into ourselves before anyone else. Tell yourself that you are beautiful and powerful!
Becoming Comfortable in my Skin: Embracing and loving my body for what it is. I always struggled with my body as I did not look like everyone else and I started to become insecure with it. But, to make the positive shift, I started to hit the gym which has forced me to not only love my body for what it is as well as become stronger each gym session.
Saying ‘no’ More Often: I am a reformed people pleaser. I have started using my voice more often to say ‘no’ to people, especially when I feel/know that it will hurt me in the long run. I would always yes to things to please others, but it would leave me anxious and overwhelmed; so enough was enough! It feels good to say no, you should try it sometime.
Emotional Resilience: I began to check in with myself regularly with the goal of overcoming what emotions I was feeling at the moment rather than allowing the emotions to consume me. I, also, started to take my journey in therapy more seriously far as doing the work to continue my growth.
These are just a few things I started to do to identify my self-worth. I still have work to do, but I am grateful for my growth in this area as I want to become the version of myself I have dreamt of for years.
We, especially women and girls, need to take those moments in the mirror to reflect on our lives and their importance before someone or something comes to destroy them. Being able to acknowledge your self-worth is hard, especially when you have these outside factors coming in to destroy what you may have started, but it’s important that you keep fighting to locate your inner self and what you deserve. I have come to learn that a lack of self-worth can put you in a state of depression because you are fighting an internal battle with yourself and the thoughts of others. I encourage women and girls from all backgrounds to take that deep look into a mirror, reflect on everything that has been through, and understand what is your self-worth. Also, when you’re feeling defeated by a partner or other party, remind yourself of what you mean to yourself with or without them.
For more self-care tips, follow @dearselfcare via Instagram and Facebook
Love,
Sharnell James, Thee Self-Care and Mental Health Advocate